Tuesday, August 16, 2011

The dumbest celebrity quotes ever

celebrities really dumber than the rest of us, or do they simply have more opportunities to prove their intellectual deficiencies for everyone to see?

Whichever it is, it takes a special sort to show up on this list more than once, an honor reserved for the likes of Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, and the ex President of the United States of America.

37. “I’m so smart now. Everyone’s always like ‘take your top off.’ Sorry, NO! They always want to get that money shot. I’m not stupid.” — Paris Hilton

36. “What’s Wal-Mart? Do they sell, like wall stuff?” — Paris Hilton

35. “The most loving thing to do is to share your bed with someone.” — Michael Jackson

34. “If you have intercourse you run the risk of dying and the ramifications of death are final.” — Cyndi Lauper

33. “Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost an important part of your life.” — Brooke Shields

32. “I hope my child will be a good Catholic like me.” — Madonna

31 “It’s really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people.” — Axl Rose

30. “I’d rather be dead than singing Satisfaction when I’m forty-five.” — Mick Jagger

29. “It’s not that I dislike many people. It’s just that I don’t like many people.” — Bryant Gumbel

28. “I look at modeling as something I’m doing for black people in general.” — model Naomi Campbell

27. “When I’m really hot, I can walk into a room and if a man doesn’t look at me, he’s probably gay.” — Kathleen Turner

26. “When you say I committed adultery, are you stating before the marriage of 1996 or prior to?” — Dallas Cowboys cornerback Deion Sanders

25. “We are going to turn this team around 360 degrees.” — NBA player Jason Kidd

24. “Listening to a woman is almost as bad as losing to one. There are only three things that women are better at than men: cleaning, cooking, and ...” — Charles Barkley

23. “If there is one word to describe Atlantic City, it’s Big Business.” — Donald Trump

22. “You know, it really doesn’t matter what the media write as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass.” — Donald Trump

21. “He speaks English, Spanish, and he’s bilingual too.” — Don King

20. “From the waist down, Earl Campbell has the biggest legs I’ve ever seen on a running back.” — John Madden

19. “Predictions are difficult, especially about the future.” — Yogi Berra

18. “The word ‘genius’ isn’t applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.” — Joe Theismann

17. “I don’t think anybody should write his autobiography until after he’s dead.” — Samuel Goldwyn

16. “I never get bored, because there’s always different puzzles, I’m wearing different clothes, there’s different contestants, there’s different prizes.” — Vanna White

15. “I was asked to come to Chicago because Chicago is one of our fifty-two states.” — Racquel Welch

14. “I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada.” — Britney Spears

13. “I’ve never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don’t like eating fish. And I know that’s very popular out there in Africa.” — Britney Spears

12. “So, where’s the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?” — Christina Aguilera

11. “I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it’s true lightness.” — Alicia Silverstone

10“I’ve got taste. It’s inbred in me.” — David Hasselhoff

9. “I cried over beauty, I cried over pain, and the other time I cried because I felt nothing. I can’t help it. I’m just a cliché of myself.” — Keanu Reeves

8. “I’m not anorexic. I’m from Texas. Are there people from Texas that are anorexic? I’ve never heard of one. And that includes me.” — Jessica Simpson

7. “Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it’s tuna but it says chicken of the sea.” — Jessica Simpson

6. “I’m sounding worse than Jessica Simpson right now. She’s looking like a rock scientist.” — Tara Reid

5. “I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman.” — Arnold Schwarzenegger

4. “I love California. I grew up in Phoenix.” — Dan Quayle

3. “You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror.” — George W. Bush

2. “Rarely is the question asked, is our children learning?” — George W. Bush

1. “There’s an old saying in Tennessee — I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again.